Listen!!! The Silence is LOUD

Today was a bittersweet day, I had a mixture of emotions. Today, I realized the Twins aren't babies anymore. They have made that big step towards even greater independence. Today was the first day of Preschool for our youngest, Emily and Alex.

I couldn't help but reflect on how much time has passed since they were newborn. They were born early and so they stayed in the NICU for a few weeks until they could learn to suck and breathe on their own. I remember seeing their tiny bodies hooked up to all sorts of wires and feeling so overwhelmed and helpless. Since they were born premature, they had to be monitored a lot. Sometimes they would stop breathing on their own and in those moments fear would grip a hold of me and I thought they wouldn't make it. Now here they are 4 years old, totally healthy and strong. Totally excited that today was their first day in "school"!

It took a good half hour to get them settled into their class. Not because they were crying and didn't want to stay but because I was getting them from their outside shoes to the inside shoes (etc) and then they both had to go to the bathroom. Alex went first and as I got back I was just getting ready to leave and Emily had to go. I figured I'd save their teachers the trip as I knew they would be bugging them often throughout the morning to go. After Emily was done washing her hands, she looked at me and said matter of factly, " Mommy you can go now!" I informed her that I couldn't because I hadn't told Alex I was leaving and that I had to walk her back to the class. To which she piped up and exclaimed, " It's ok Mommy, I can tell him and I CAN walk by myself. I am BIG girl now!" LOL ....*Sigh* She is right of course. She is a big girl now and I have to stop thinking of them as babies.

After dropping them off, I was flabbergasted and wondering what now? I wasn't sure what to do at first! For 4 years my daily routine revolved around the twins and the other 3 children when they weren't in school. Since I wanted to get back into the routine of going to the gym, I decided to head there. After a vigorous workout I realized...... It had been way too long since I visited the gym and I had better make more of an effort to go more consistently. Thanks to Headstart, I can now make this a part of my morning routine. On the way home I grabbed a coffee thinking how weird it was there was no arguing or fighting going on in the back seat. I didn't even turn the radio on like I usually do. That's when I realized that the silence was way too LOUD!!

Here I thought I would enjoy the peace and quiet, and I did somewhat once I got home but all of a sudden I had an overwhelming surge of loneliness sweep over me. However, it didn't last long! I totally enjoyed their little conversations in the morning as I sipped my coffee or watch them do silly things. They are quite the entertainers however, I am thankful that I can now take this time for me. It's been hard to have alone time since they were born and I am looking forward to finding myself again! LOL

Once I realized my time was up and I had to get the twins, I found myself wishing I had a few more minutes to myself. They will be going three days a week in the mornings so we will still have part of the afternoon and two mornings of the week to go on our little adventures like we used to last year. Actually, it is refreshing to have them take this step. I don't care if the silence is loud in the mornings, I welcome it with open ears :)

Showers of Blessings

Rain, rain go away

Come again another day

Little children want to play

Rain, rain go away!

How often have you wanted to sing this song in the past few weeks? We have gotten so much rain recently that some of our friends have flooded basements. It's amazing how it just keeps pouring down oblivious to the fact that there are disgruntled parents cooped up inside with bored, crying children. No matter what activities you try to encourage your children to do they don't want to do those things. Whether it's playing a game, playing with each other in their rooms, doing crafts, play with play dough or watching a movie, nothing is exciting enough for my children when it's raining. Why is it on a beautiful day they want to stay inside and all of a sudden those activities hold their interest but when its horrible weather they want to go out?

One particular rainy day, I had set the twins up with crafts. Since they were distracted, I decided to tackle the ever growing mountain of laundry. The older children were at school and I was making it a goal to have everything done before they got home. As I was sorting clothes, Alex decided he wanted to make breakfast. I had already cooked them oatmeal and they ate all of it so I don' t think it was hunger that prompted him to do this. I was focused on my task at hand and about 10 to 15 minutes into doing laundry I could hear giggles and laughter coming from the kitchen so, I decided to investigate.

Low and behold, there they were just 2 1/2 years old making their own breakfast. There was a dozen eggs smashed all over the floor! Emily was in the process of pouring cereal on the eggs while Alex was adding the milk and stirring it. What a MESS!!! I laugh now when I think back but at the time I wasn't smiling. Nonstop for almost 2 years and even sometimes now, I clean a room while they trash another one. There are countless stories I could tell of them. Like the time I came into the kitchen after getting clothes off the line and they were jumping on the counter on JUICE BOXES laughing as the juice squirted out and ran down the fridge and wall. There are times I wonder if our house will ever be normal or halfway decent again. But in the midst of all this chaos, I am counting my blessings. Thankful for all that God has given me and knowing that He wouldn't give us any more than we can bare.

Just this morning, I was more tempted to groan and complain rather than count my blessings. I tackled the downstairs washroom and while I was giving it a thorough cleaning, Alex decided to shine my kitchen floors......with margarine!! Not only that but he shined the stove and stools too. I am not sure if Emily helped him. He blames her and she said that it was him but I only saw Alex in the kitchen. What a mess to clean up. On the bright side, everything is very slippery and smooth now. LOL

I am so thankful that it is not a rainy day today. The twins are now ready to go outside with me for a nice walk. As I reflect on the showers of blessings in my life, I am so thankful that I serve a God who wants to bless us beyond measure. So much so that we can hardly contain it. He gave me a double blessing when he gave me the Twins. He has blessed me with a wonderful husband and 5 healthy children. It would take hours to share the showers of blessings that have come into my life. To many time we focus on what we think we need and take for granted the blessings that have already happened to us. The old hymn says "Count your blessings, name them one by one....Count your many blessings see what God has done!" It will amaze you as you begin to count your blessings just how much God has blessed you with!



"And I will send showers, showers of blessings, which will come just when they are needed" Ezekiel 34:26, NLT